


The only thing we have, besides this car, is each other.

by princesssroyalpinkpanties



Series: All that's ever mattered is that we're together [1]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: Headcanon, Hurt Dean Winchester, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Protective Sam Winchester, Wincest - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-11-01
Updated: 2016-11-01
Packaged: 2018-08-28 08:26:03
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,244
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8438455
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/princesssroyalpinkpanties/pseuds/princesssroyalpinkpanties
Summary: They've lost their mother for the second time, but Dean finds all the comfort he needs in his little brother.





	

His mother's voice is just a low murmur in his ears, Dean stopped listening the minute he realized where she was going with this talk. She was saying goodbye. Dean could punch himself for being stupid enough to not see this coming.

When she tries to hug him, he just steps back, denying himself the comfort she was trying to give. So fucking stupid he can't even look at her without letting the tears fall. Instead, he looks to the floor, tries to control his face to not show any emotion but knows that he's failing at it. His well known barriers protecting his heart.

"I love you both." He hears in the distance, his heart stops. He wants to look at her, but he knows he won't be able to stop the words if he does. _Please, mom, stay. We can make this work, don't leave me again. Sammy needs you, I need you. I'm still your little boy, I never stopped being. Never stopped missing you. Don't leave us again._

He doesn't look. Doesn't even blink. Not even when he hears the door slamming. His eyes focused only on the cold floor.

He can hear Sam getting closer, but still can't look up. He can see his shoes standing there, waiting until he's ready. When he does, Dean can see his own despair mirrored in his little brother's eyes, tears already shinning in his eyes.

He hears the crying sound that comes out of his mouth when he tries to give Sam a reassuring smile and opens his arms, holding his breath when his brother's body press against his own. Instant rush of affection and wholeness growing inside his chest, trying to fight the sadness and fear that settled in his heart. He closes his hands into fists as he pushes Sam closer, tighter, tries to disappear inside his brother's arms; closes his eyes and rests his head against his neck, absorbing the heat and narrowing his world to Sam's heart beat.  

He can't stop the tears from flooding. He opens his mouth, tries to say something, to comfort his little brother, but a sob is the only thing that comes out of him.

"Shh, Dean. It's okay. You still have me." Sam says, his own voice full of emotion.

"I'm so sorry, Sammy." He forces himself to speak. He's sorry for so many things, all the suffering that his brother went through. The only thing that kept Dean optimistic was knowing that Sam's gonna have his mother back when he'd bring he back home. And now they were alone again with new wounds to heal.

Sam doesn't say anything, only hugs him harder.

They stay like that for a while. Dean with his face pressed against Sam's neck, Sam with his face pressed against his neck. Both crying and comforting each other. Dean feels a huge weight, one that he didn't realized he was carrying, slowly leaving his chest. He didn't know how much he missed Sam, even after he got him back from the British assholes, they didn't had the time to talk about it, to take care of each other the way they usually did, to heal the emotional wounds together. Dean couldn't hold his brother in his sleep, kiss away their doubts and fears, remind him that he'd never let him go again.

They were alone now, but Dean can't force himself to be the brother Sam needs him to be. He remembers the young boy who was strong enough to carry his baby brother in his arms out of the fire, when they lost their mom for the first time. But now, that little kid is scared. He's paralyzed and he can't be strong enough to carry his overgrown baby brother out of this fire.

Sam pulls away from him, just enough so they can look at each other's eyes. Then, Sam closes his eyes and leans in to kiss Dean.

This kiss is not gentle like the ones Sam usually gives him, it's desperate, urgent, full of pain and need. Dean opens his mouth and Sam stick his tongue inside, circling it, tasting every bit of his own like he's hungry. Dean knows he is.

"I didn't realize how much I've missed you." Dean whispers when they break the kiss, breathing hard. He missed him like he never did before, needed him like he never needed, because this was different. All they've been through, everyone and everything they've lost, nothing could prepare them to lose their mother, their blood, for the second time. "You're all I have, Sammy."

"You're all I need, Dean." Sam whispers before kissing him again. His hands curl up around Sam's hair, pushing him closer, chests, hips and feet fitting together as two pieces of the same puzzle. Two halves of one soul.

One of Sam's hands go down to his lower back, fingers beneath his shirt tracing his bare skin. The slightest touch is enough to burn Dean, craving the intimacy he used to have with his brother before things went crazy. He breaks the kiss again, takes his clothes from the waist up, helps Sam do the same.

"I need to feel you inside me, this time, Sammy." Dean says when their bare chests are pressed together, feeling Sam's heart beats in sync with his own. Warm, sensitive skin, all his senses full of Sam. "It's the only way you can make the emptiness disappear." Sam nods, understands.

They're too desperate to go to the bedroom. Dean feels like every second he's not kissing Sam he may lose his mind. He sits in the table, throws notebooks to the side and lays with Sam on top of him. His weight a welcome relief , Dean knows that he's not alone.

Sam starts to kiss him with softness, giving Dean the comfort he couldn't accept from his mother. Dean closes his eyes to the touch of Sam's mouth tracing down his jaw, his neck, his collarbone, leaving wet kisses and kind words.

When Sam finally slips inside him, Dean feels all his carefully built barriers crash without making a sound. He knows Sam is the only one who ever saw him that way, and the only who ever will.   

"I've missed you so much. I thought I've lost you... Forever. Thought I'd never see... or touch you again." Sam says, urgency in his tone, while he thrusts his hip deep inside Dean. "Now you're here... I can feel you... You're real."

Dean wraps his arms around Sam's shoulders, their sweat bellies pressed together. Nothing would ever be more real than this.

"I'll never leave you again, Sammy. You're the only person I can't afford to lose."

His words make Sam speed up his thrusts, both of them too eager to do things properly, just wanting to touch and breathe and feel each other.

Later, they go to bed, Sam's head on Dean's chest, Dean brushing his thumb lightly in his brother's cheek. His fears and insecurities all pushed aside by the feeling of his little brother next to him.

"You know we can deal with this, right, Dean?" Sam asks, a hint of doubt in his voice. His little brother is back, the one that needs him to tell everything's gonna be okay. Only now, Dean knows he can.

"Yeah, I know. We can make it through, whatever this is. Together, like we always do."

"Together."

Dean knows that's all that matters.

**Author's Note:**

> Dedicated to my little squad <3


End file.
